2017
She chose the path that seemed less traveled.
She came to many forks in the road.
She made a wrong turn, once, twice, three, too many to count.
She lost her way of direction for some time.
But with her eye on True North she kept tracking through and finally decided to make her own path.
Sometimes you need to trail off the path and make a new one.
Because only then, was she able to see where the rest of her journey would lead her.
Recently I have been asked, Where do you see yourself in five years? Answer? -didn't really have one.
Certainly I know what I want out of my life, I know that I have goals, but in all honesty, there is so much that can happen in five years that it's impossible for me to wrap my head around it to say. Pondering over this question has me asking myself over and over: What am I going to be doing five years from now? So many of us feel lost in this world, simultaneously many of us know what we want and yet don't concentrate on that goal hard enough we trail off the path.
If you would have asked me that same question five years ago I would have had a solid answer. But now, I feel time is so delicate and goes by in a blink of an eye, that to do everything I want is going to take abysmal concentration, development, persistence, and discipline. I was told by the inquirer to evaluate on that a little and come back with an answer next week.
As a result, this got me to making a mental list of all the things I would like to accomplish and/or be in road to the next five years:
All of these are greatly achievable if I stay on my path.
Lately I've been telling myself to think more positively.
I tend to go in wishing things will go right but always default to preparing for the worst. I need to stop doing that! The power of positive thinking is so strong that if you go into every situation, good or bad, know that you are going through it for a reason. This too I have always been a strong believer of.
I'm at an age where I need to seriously hone down and focus. Set milestones to where I want future Natalie to be! I know what I want, the problem here I guess has been to have that someone, to keep me on track on getting there. But then, there's that double edge sword - I have been asked that question before but no one has necessarily made me keep to my word of path.
The person who asked me this recently, not only wants to know, but I can see that they want to help me get there. Just how they are so open about their goals and their dreams, and the path they know they have to take to get there is tough, but it's there! With much discipline and concentration on that goal they ARE going to get there! Knowing that, once I come up with a straight answer, they will help me along the way to my goal oriented path.
It's funny to think that we have turned into a generation of instant gratification. There are so many people that are no longer patient. In results to this, myself included, us wanting to reach those goals can see it as nearly impossible, and can't get there quick enough, hence end up settling for what we can.
However, those that do fall, and pick themselves up for the millionth time, are the ones that know they are meant for greater things. With that patience, and the drive for their own success, they will get there. I, will get there.
To quote Brian Adams:
"Learn the art of patience. Apply discipline to your thoughts when they become anxious over the outcome of a goal. Impatience breeds anxiety, fear, discouragment and failure. Patience creates confidence, decisiveness, and a rational outlook, which eventually leads to success"
Butterflies in your stomach. Cheesy ass smile across your face. Major feels about the person - this my fellow readers are signs of being sprung.
Yup I said it, I'm sprung. Don't know how this happened, well I do but that's beside the point. You never know who's going to come into your life and give you the unexpected. As you are well aware from my previous dating entries, which seemed to be going nowhere, I believe I have found the diamond in the rough. The peanut to my jelly, the cheese to my macaroni, and to quote The Little Rascals, "He melts me like a Popsicle stick on the 4th of July". Ha ha, but in all seriousness I think I may have found my match.
I was at the point of forgetting about the dating life because I was so over all the f*ckery. Then, he slipped into my DM with a unique way to start the conversation. From there, exchanged numbers and started to get to know each-other better.
Come first date/meet-up. Didn't give me a choice really as to whether or not I was able to meet on said day, but instead said with a confident, "I'll see you tomorrow Nat". Family timing lead to things not working out as planned BUT did end up meeting on said day. (He later told me that he thought I wasn't going to show up and flake, due to our conversation leading up to the meet up.) Needless to say we hit it off right away. He opened up in a way I have never experienced for someone opening up until maybe a few months knowing eachother. This immediately grew my attraction. Who is this man? Is he for real though? Yes, very much real, real since day one. We talked about our hopes, dreams, goals, family and came to find that we share many of the same qualities and have the same drive for what we want. That in itself said so much. To me, nothing is more attractive than a man who knows what he wants, and not only that but goes for it, and IS working towards it.
I've always been the one in the relationship to push my counterpart to do more. Go for the things they wished out of their life, careers, etc. Granted I had the support to pursue my dreams and goals but neither of them have ever pushed me to go for it in the extent I needed to be pushed. This is what this man does for me, he compliments me where I can't myself. Having someone who understands you need to do what it takes to get where you want with your goals, is one of the biggest support systems you can have.
Yes this is still all very new, and these feelings are for sure the first time butterflies of a new relationship forming. Can't say what's going to happen down the road, but things are going well so far and for sure as hell I'm going to enjoy it!
2017. Social media is still on the rise, Snapchat filters, #FOMO is still in effect, era of selfies, #squadgoals and #BAE. Speaking of BAE (before anyone else) for those of you still out of the "hip" lingo; finding your BAE now a days is a tad bit more difficult than before.
Based on personal experience and just seeing what friends of mine in the dating scene have had plenty of headaches of, let me share some background...
Now we have apps and websites to help people like myself find "the one". But what these apps have also created is an open window for hookups, f*ckboys, the unwanted d*ck pics, men/boys thinking it's okay to leave shivery a thing of the past. I'm not saying that all these men are the same, however, I feel because you are hidden behind a phone and or computer screen, you kind of get straight to the point. But, once you do find someone who isn't a complete creep, make conversation and make plans to meet up, they either:
A) never follow through
B) turn out to be a completely different in person than they portray themselves on the app
C) You two actually hit it off but then eventually, one of you gets Ghosted (when you cut off communication with someone with no explanation or reasons)
Making the whole headache of dating in 2017 feel like a complete waist of time. You delete the app(s) for a few weeks or so, get bored and go through the same headache all over again; telling yourself that this time it's going to be different and you're going to be extra picky and filter your selections more heavily. Because, at the end of the day, when we tell ourselves I'm better off being single and doing me, we still want that someone. Let's face it, it's interesting to see what kind of people find us attractive as well.
As mentioned before, this has happened in my own 2017 dating life. It's frustrating as hell! Coming out of a four year relationship and putting myself back out there is hard. At this point of my life I am looking for someone to eventually marry. I know this is not going to happen over night, let alone may not even happen with the first man from these sites I end up dating. But, that is my ultimate goal! I want a partner who has goals, loves his family, wants to grow with me, be a gentlemen, and most importantly someone I can see making memories with for hopefully, the rest of my life. That's not too much to ask for, is it? I know woman aren't innocent in all this either, there are some questionable actions from both sexes.
In conclusion, I will be sharing my dating stories from time to time. To give you a few laughs and to just give you examples as to how dating, for a Millennial such as myself, can be a real pain in the ass. Until next time, have a beautiful day everyone! And to quote Ellen Degeneres, "Be kind to one another."