#breakthesilence

Young. Wild. & Growing. - Stop the Stigma

In the media, there has been a lot of focus on the woman and young girls. Why? Due to recent politics and events, there has been a mass discussion of the woman and equal rights. Despite what your beliefs are, who are we to say that a woman is less than a man? Or that a man can’t amount to the same skills as a woman? We are all under the same homosapien umbrella. Yes, there are certain things that only certain sexes can do, but who/what makes us want to separate the two?

Society is constantly placing two categories on two different sidelines. This categorizing goes way beyond sexual orientation but goes to include the color of our skin, where we live, what we believe and how we see the world. Society is always going to pin one against the other. In this case, we are seeing men and woman at a constant battle of the sexes.


In light of recent political events and movements, we are seeing a BIG outspoken voice. Woman are done working twice as hard to “amount” to the same skills as a man. Furthermore, once she gets to that point in power there are still those (mainly men) intimidated by the fact that there’s a woman in authority. There are so many double standards to the opposite sex it’s TIRING!

I feel that society is falling backward with all its past accomplishments. Woman have been fighting for their rights for more than 50 years, and that’s just in the US. There are still many women worldwide that don’t even come close to the success that woman in the US has accomplished. Why are we shaming woman? Why are we categorizing them as the “weaker” sex? Yes, this may sound like a feminist rant to you but is it really feminist if we are just asking for society to treat us (woman) in the same respect as they do a man? No. It’s an equal opportunity.

Speaking of equal opportunity, if this is true, as many contracts to work have so stated, then why is the woman still having to work twice as harder than a man in the same company to reach the same pay? Why are woman subjected to ridicule and crude jokes of “blowing” her way to the top? Just because she is female? A man in power get’s respect but a woman in power gets mocked.


Another subject to touch on-reproduction. Why are we trying to control women's bodies? What a woman decides to do with her body is her choice. No one has a right to justify that choice but her. Why aren’t men being pulled into this responsibility? It does take two to tango. It does take a SPERM and an EGG to reproduce. Why should the woman be thrown into the corner as to what she decides to do with HER body?


There have been many women throughout history who have broken through the barriers and shown the world that woman are capable too. There have also been a woman in our own lives that have broken the chain of command in our family dynamics. Why should it be 50/50? Why not 100/100?

Men and woman should be treated equally, regardless of the color of their skin, sexual identity, and their beliefs. We are all human. As a millennial, much of our generation is aiming towards a better tomorrow. Bringing more light onto worldly matters and country systematics that needs to be changed and continued to fight for. The march is not over, it has only begun.

Young. Wild. & Frustrated. - Suicide

I’ve written on this subject before. And I will continue to speak upon it. Suicide is still a word laced with venom. People don’t want to talk about it, and when it is talked about there are many…

They should have seeked help…

That’s a stupid reason to want to die…

I never saw it coming…

Suicide affects everyone and anyone. It does not matter what age, gender, religion, country or distinctive to one group of people. Suicidal thoughts can occur in whatever stage in life, and it comes in many forms. Depression being the leading factor along with mental illness such as Bipolar Disorder, Schizophrenia, personality disorders and substance abuse.

I believe that many people don’t like to touch on this subject because it is a very hard subject to understand. Every person who has committed suicide has had their own reasons and logic to ending their lives. It’s hard to understand their stories and to step into their minds when they’re all alone, all we merely see is the surface of their emotions.


Many of us also don’t know how to handle a person who ha(s/d) suicidal tendencies. Even when they ask for help, whether bluntly or subliminally, many of us, come to freeze on the topic, not knowing what to say or do. 

When confronted with someone who is having suicidal thoughts, here are some things you can ask to get a conversation started and to seek help—

HOW TO START THE CONVERSATION

"I have been feeling concerned about you lately."

"Recently, I have noticed some differences in you and wondered how you are doing."

"I wanted to check in with you because you haven’t seemed yourself lately."

QUESTIONS YOU CAN ASK

"When did you begin feeling like this?"

"Did something happen that made you start feeling this way?"

"How can I best support you right now?"

"Have you thought about getting help?"

WHAT YOU CAN SAY THAT HELPS

"You are not alone in this. I’m here for you."

"You may not believe it now, but the way you’re feeling will change."

"I may not be able to understand exactly how you feel, but I care about you and want to help."

"When you want to give up, tell yourself you will hold off for just one more day, hour, minute—whatever you can manage." 

(source: https://www.helpguide.org/articles/suicide-prevention/suicide-prevention.htm)

But most importantly, you must be genuine in your actions. I’ve had a number of people in my life that have come forward to having suicidal thoughts or have attempted suicide. It’s never easy, and everyone had their own stories.

The first person that told me they cut to releave the pain was 12 years old. It came up while watching The Craft, where one of the main characters was a cutter. My friend at the time, said nonchalantly, ‘that’s not they way to cut if you really want to die’. Thinking it was an odd thing to say, she lifts up her sleeve and shows me her scars, some of them still fresh. She looks at me and says, ‘this is the proper way’. I was never taught to react to this sort of situation, I knew what I was seeing wasn’t right, but I was asked to not to say a word. I didn’t.

Fortunately, my friend fought through her depression, or at least took measures to better her mental health, and is now living life with a husband to support her and three beautiful children. Despite the fact that I didn’t know how to react to her confession, I should have never kept silent.


Some statistics on suicide:

“Close to 800,000 people die due to suicide every year, which is one person every 40 seconds. Many more attempt suicide. Suicide occurs throughout the lifespan and is the second leading cause of death among 15-29 year olds globally

Suicide accounted for 1.4% of all deaths worldwide, making it the 18th leading cause of death in 2016.”
(source: http://www.who.int/mental_health/prevention/suicide/suicideprevent/en/)

These statistics are taken on a worldwide scale. However what I would like to focus on are those tied to bullying, and most commonly now—cyber bullying. Most recently, a story came out about a 9 year-old boy, allegedly committing suicide due to him coming out as gay.

Elementary schools are seeing a rise in suicide numbers. Many reasons as to why are still unknown but what they have come to see is that many of these children were being bullied to end their lives—

“Schoolmates called Sellars gay and made fun of his clothes before he took his life in Akron, Ohio, in May, his mother told reporters at the time. After his death, his older brothers were taunted on Snapchat and Twitter. His mother said some suggested they should kill themselves, too.  

Stormiyah Denson-Jackson, 12, was bullied at her Washington, D.C., boarding school, her mother told a local television station. When the girl reported it to school officials, her mother said, she was herself accused of bullying. She was found dead in her dorm room in January. 

Taye was assaulted by a fellow student in a school bathroom two days before he hanged himself in Cincinnati in 2017, his family said...”

(source: https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2018/09/10/rising-child-suicide-defy-answers-prevention-month/1197113002/)

More reports have come out in recent years about youth committing suicide due to hate. Hate towards their race, gender, and overall presence. The unfortunate stigma in social media, is the need to be liked. To show your followers you have it all and are #livingmybestlife. Posting photos for follows or posing in ways a youth should not be posing.

Where do they get these examples?—profiles of such Instagram famous models or celebrities. It is seen every-single-day. These “influences” lead the ones wanting to fit in, to pick on those that don’t follow these “social guidelines”.

Fortunately there are also those in social media who use their platform to promote positivity. This being overall LOVE. Love for yourself, your flaws, and to look past the hate(rs). The world is already an angry place and we don’t need to keep adding to it.

In light of recent actions, shootings, hate crimes, and government reign, there have been more people coming out to speak on such taboos: gun control, racial injustice, suicide and mental health.  These people, strong enough to speak up, and even stronger to voice the words of those who can’t, or are too afraid, give light to something that remains in the dark.

It’s okay to talk about suicide. It’s okay to not be okay. We shouldn’t shut off people for feeling HUMAN.


NATIONAL SUICIDE PREVENTION LIFELINE: 

1-800-273-8255