Suicide: the act or an instance of taking one's own life voluntarily and intentionally.

Mental Health: a person’s condition with regard to their psychological and emotional well-being.

For many these topics are taboo. It''s sensitive to touch upon. But in light of Suicide Awareness Month, I feel these topics need to be addressed.

Everyone has been affected by suicide in one shape or form. It's inescapable. We have all had family, friends, and even ourselves, that have been touched and or thought about suicide in some part of our lives. Suicide not only affects the individual but everyone else around that individual.

FACTS:

Suicide is the 10th leading cause of death in the U.S.
Each year over 4,000 Americans die by suicide
For every 1 suicide, 25 attempt
On average there are 121 suicides a day
Firearms count for 50% of suicides
Suicide rate is highest mid-age
Men die by suicide 3.5x more than woman

(source: https://afsp.org/about-suicide/suicide-statistics/)

Let me just say now, you are not weak if you have ever thought and/or tried to commit suicide. You are still here. You fought through, or continue to fight through, whatever it was/is that eats at you. Unfortunately this isn't the case for everyone.

Those people who have chose this tragic end aren't weak either. Many people may argue with me on this, but these people have been battling with whatever demons they had inside of them. It's not an easy decision to make and for many it is the only option they think they have to escape.

Without mentioning any names, throughout my life I have had a handful of people I have been associated with, and/or really close to that have either attempted or committed suicide. Two different types of personalities in this case, is bullying and depression. Two completely different people with totally different situations, both of which attempted suicide more than once.

Person Number One: Had a family that was constantly belittling them. Making them feel worthless, stupid, anything that they would do wouldn't be anything in comparison to their other children. They had already attempted suicide once, this was before we had even crossed paths. They took a knife to their wrists, and cut themselves. According to them, they're family didn't take it that seriously. They took it as a sign for attention. Many may argue that it is. I have to agree, it is a call for attention, but it is also screaming for help. It's a "look at me, I'm not okay."
The second attempt, I was present. I did everything in my power to stop this person from running into the street to be hit by the next coming vehicle. I literally held this person down, cried with them and told them this wasn't a solution. After what seemed hours, I finally got them to get back into the car and wake up their parents in the middle of the night to speak with them. Both of us crying, I tried to tell their mother that this was serious. It should't just be brushed off. And even in that moment, even though they were claiming they knew it was serious, I didn't feel the compassion. I didn't feel the necessity or the light going up inside their head that they needed help. In this likelihood, there was an improvement in attitude. Just because someone cared enough to stop them and take steps into making things better, was all this person needed.

For some this is just enough. For others, it's more mental than that.

Person Number Two: This other person suffered and still suffers from chronic depression. Two attempted suicides but luckily neither took away their life. It's a daily battle and for someone who suffers chronic depression, the smallest thing can trigger suicidal tendencies. But with therapy and medication, these thoughts and feelings have been controlled. It's an everyday struggle and another lived day is another day of strength.

Two different scenarios, two different reasons. The point is you can't put people with suicidal thoughts into a category box. There still is so many more reasons than research has taught us about suicide. Ironically, those that suffer the most, hardly ever show signs of depression and suicidal thoughts. This is why it takes many of those people around them in a whirlwind of shock.

There are so many- I wish they would have told me, I wish I would have paid more attention. The truth is, when someone is that depressed, there is nothing we can really do. The best thing, in my opinion, is to tell them that we are there for them, no matter what. If they do open up to us, get them help. And if anyone ever tells you not to say antyhing, that's the worst thing that you can do for them. Silence is deadly.

Things You Can Do For Your Own Mental Health

For starters, find something to ease away any negative energy. Something that will relax you, something that will let out all that aggression in a healthy way.

For example, when I'm feeling overwhelmed or stressed, I work out. I also write down my thoughts in my journal or in poetry. I color or paint to ease my mind. Those are all sorts of mental therapy, FOR ME.

One major thing, in my opinion, talk to someone. Go to someone you trust, speak out your thoughts and stresses in your current life. Sometimes that's all we need to do is vent, get things off our chest, and just let someone else hear it so we know it's not all in our heads.

Remember that it is okay to cry. Cry out everything that you are feeling, these are also known as emotional tears. Emotional tears may have many health benefits; emotional tears contain stress hormones and other toxins. Researchers have theorized that crying flushes these things out of your system, though more research is needed in this area. Crying for long periods of time releases oxytocin and endogenous opioids, otherwise known as endorphins. These feel-good chemicals can help ease both physical and emotional pain. Once the endorphins are released, your body may go into somewhat of a numb stage. Oxytocin can give you a sense of calm or well-being. It’s another example of how crying is a self-soothing action. (source: https://www.healthline.com/health/benefits-of-crying#breathing-in-babies9)

Lastly, never apologize for your emotions.

If you or anyone you know has suicidal thoughts or just needs to speak to someone, call 1-800-273-8255.

There is always hope.